TV with MeeVee

Planet Unicorn

It's a weird parody of children's programming. And it's also a parody of Tom Cruise. And it's also just bizarre. It's... Planet Unicorn! See all six episodes of fabulous unicorny entertainment!

Weekend Picks: March 29-30

Dexter
Serial killers put the psycho in psychodrama.

Breaking Bad
Let's spend Sunday evening down at the meth-lab, torturing drug dealers.

Big Brother
Alliances shift as cabin fever takes hold. Nominations for eviction are announced.

Battlestar Galactica Specials Air Tonight

The ramp up to the long, long, long, long awaited 4th season of "Battlestar Galactica" has begun in force, and to start your motors running Scifi will be airing two behind-the-scenes specials tonight. We'll get "Battlestar Galactica: Revealed" at 10pm and "Battlestar Galactica: Phenomenon" at 10:30.

"Revealed" is a trip behind the scenes that promises many clips and cuts to talking heads of writers and directors. Whereas "Phenomenon" will be a trip behind the fandom that promises many clips and cuts to talking heads of fans (some of whom are famous!). It promises to be an hour jam-packed with the kind of minutia and trivia you'll be repeating at science-fiction conventions for years to come. Not that you go to those things, of course.

Do you watch behind-the-scenes specials, sports fans? Do the extras on your DVDs sit gathering dusts or do you gobble up every bit of media that you can? Come back tonight and tell us what you thought of the revealed phenomenon of "Battlestar Galactica."

"My Name Is Earl" Goes To Paris. Hilton.

I'm looking forward to the return of "My Name Is Earl" on NBC next Thursday. I even like the sound of the episode. I'm just a little nervous about one particular guest star. But hey, "How I Met Your Mother" didn't jump the shark just because Britney Spears was on, right? Right?

Here's the official NBC episode description: Earl (Jason Lee) is still lying in the middle of the road next to Billie (Alyssa Milano), both of whom are unconscious after being hit by a car. The accident puts Earl in a coma and takes him to an alternate world in the form of a sitcom. Meanwhile, Randy (Ethan Suplee), Darnell (Eddie Steeples), Joy (Jaime Pressly) and Catalina (Nadine Velazquez) begin doing whatever they can to ensure Earl lives. After several attempts, Earl continues to be stuck in a fevered state and is visited by Paris Hilton in his dream.

"Miss Guided" Grade: C-

ABC's new sitcom "Miss Guided" is one of a number of shows from the network lately that sound promising but...somehow...miss the mark. Think of "Eli Stone," "Men In Trees," "Big Shots," even "Dirty Sexy Money." (C'mon, I know you want to like it, but really, is it that good?) Nonetheless, in this strange March mid-season, with the writers strike and NCAA basketball both messing up normal viewing habits, I seem to have watched four episodes of "Miss Guided" in the last 10 days or so. Go figure.

Judy Greer stars as high-school guidance counselor Becky Freeley, a "nice" girl who's starting to realize that it's good to be a little bit bad from time to time. That may have to do with the fact that she's closing in on 30 and still single. Cheery and perky, her darker thoughts usually voiced in asides, she could be a winning character, but the show is kooky in mostly predictable ways.

"Project Runway" Stars Are Everywhere

I exaggerate. But seriously, the "Project Runway" stars are in many, many places right now. Season 1 winner Jay McCarroll will be attending the Boston Indie Film Festival as a special guest and the subject of a short documentary about the creative process.

Meanwhile, Judge Nina Garcia and season 4 winner Christian Siriano will make guest appearances on "Ugly Betty." And Christian also dropped by Craig Ferguson's late late show:

"Make Me A Supermodel" Reunion Special: Dullsville

I was going to liveblog the "Make Me A Supermodel" reunion special last night but absolutely nothing interesting happened.

I guess there were a few moments. We had confirmation the entire viewing audience is obsessed with the Ronnie/Ben bromance thing. Yes, we knew that, but still, funny to see it confirmed by all the fanmail. And of course Casey had to have a reunion with the snake he was so afraid of. Nothing like a terrified model holding an enormous python.

It's also amusing to hear that the Cory Bautista quit reading blogs about "Make Me A Supermodel" because he was tired of people calling him fat. If you don't like people calling you fat, maybe you should pick a job which doesn't entail judging people's bodies.

But otherwise, the reunion special was pretty much a bust. Tune in next week for the finale.

Holy Patrick Duffy In The Shower! Dr. Sara Returns To "Prison Break!"

As greater minds than I have said, W! T! F! After leaving Fox's "Prison Break" in a bitter contract dispute last year, only to have her character decapitated by producers, Sarah Wayne Callies is returning to the show as Dr. Sara Tancredi! Turns out that wasn't her head in the box after all.

A lot of fans will be glad to have her and Wentworth Miller's Michael Scofield back as a couple. And this is a show that has never shied away from outlandish plot twists - like having Michael break his brother out of the federal pen in season one, only to end up in a Mexican jail himself for the duration of season three. But the Hollywood chriopractic community is going to be thrilled with the increase in business after the writers finish twisting themselves into frickin' pretzels to make this one work. Several posts I've seen this morning suggest the shark is bring jumped here - although some say that happened when the head in the box turned up. Anyhoo, interviews with the producers are here and here, and a fan perspective is here.

Morning reads

• Picking the order of finish of the remaining contestants on "American Idol" is no task for the faint of heart, but they get it mostly right. I am hoping, however, that rocker David Cook can overtake cutie pie David Archuleta. (Buddy TV)
• A "Dirty Sexy Money" departure. (Buddy TV and Televisionista)
• Reflecting on plans for a "Children of Men" series. (TV Addict)
• Lindsay Lohan is cast as one of the "Manson Girls." I believe this is our "Write Your Own Joke"© item of the day. I've posted the mugshots at right to aid you in your writing. (TV Guide)
• There are only six scripted shows among the Prime-Time Top 20 for viewers 18-49. SIX. (TV By The Numbers)
• I thought that guy Teller was supposed to be really smart. Not. (AP)
• Updating those changes on "Gossip Girl." (GMMR)
• Are you ready for some "Tudors?" (Hollywood Reporter)

Tonight's Picks: Friday, March 28

NCAA Basketball
Regional semifinals.

Battlestar Galactica: Revealed
Chat with the producers to learn more about the show's upcoming final season, the way they see the characters, and more. Followed by interviews with the stars in "Battlestar Galactica: The Phenomenon."

Friday Night Smackdown
Edge vs. Undertaker; Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Chris Jericho.

Canterbury's Law
Russell and Chester help Elizabeth when Zach Williams investigates her defense of Ethan Foster. Meanwhile, Molly gets ready for her legal debut.

"Gossip Girl" Gossip - Is Little Bro Gay?

Is the pretty, sensitive and recently suicidal Eric van der Woodsen on "Gossip Girl" gay ? We're about to find out, according to Televisionista. But if so, the maker of this YouTube video is gonna be really really sad. I bet she even cries.

A Couple Of Afternoon Links

• Seth Rogen in a weed-friendly comedy! Dude! (TV Guide)
• Looks like "Friday Night Lights" converted on fourth down. (TV Barn)
• Nikki Finke thinks NBC honcho Jeff Zucker has lost his mind with this "My Name is Earl" promo in which he gets in a couple of writers-strike-related digs. I think any network exec who goes on a show and isn't brandon Tartikoff needs mental help, but that's another issue. (Deadline Hollywood Daily)

"ANTM" Photos Are Up

After I went to bed last night, the CW web team posted the most recent "ANTM" photos. Bless their little hearts for making sure I've got my "Top Model" pictures before lunchtime.

Whitney won with her grunge look, taking to heart the show's earlier lesson about looking like you're in pain. In this case, she looked like her track marks were hurting. Way to be a role model.

The remaining photos are up at the CW model gallery.

"Gossip Girl" Filming With Untamed Hair

"Gossip Girl" is still filming new episodes in NYC, and if this shot of Blake Lively is any indication, there's going to be a scene involving windblown hair. If I remember my film classes right, windblown hair is a symbol of untethered sexuality, which implies that someone on the show is going to get laid. Of course, with "Gossip Girl," that's not much of a prediction.

Japanese Game Shows: Always Strange

Maybe it's the lack of subtitles, and maybe it's the game-show convention from the other side of the world I just don't get, but Japanese game shows are nothing short of mind-boggling to me. In this one, there don't even seem to be any prizes: It's just about being bitten by snakes. I'm guessing they're not poisonous, but still: Snakebite to the nose! For entertainment!

Mega Morning Reading Roundup!

• Jay Leno mocks the gay people? The gay people strike back. (Tifaux)
• Bob Newhart follows Jane Seymour into career twilight with a Hallmark mystery movie. (TV Squad)
• USA greenlights some new shows. (TV Squad)
• Some of them may turn up on NBC sooner or later. (TV Decoder)
• SIGNS OF THE APOCALYPSE: CBS is giving Elisha Cuthbert - aka Jack Bauer's useless, brain-dead, slack-jawed bimbette daughter Kim on "24" - her own drama series. (GMMR)
• "The Hills" hits a ratings high. THIS is what you're watching? I'm ashamed. (Hollywood Reporter)
• "Jericho" finale a Nielsen crater. (TV Decoder)
• Nikki Finke exposes "asswipe" CBS memo about not parking in execs' spots. (Deadline Hollywood Daily)
• Even Rod Serling couldn't tell Emmitt Till's story on TV in the 50s. (AP)
• Joss Whedon plucks a "Battlestar Galactica" name for "Dollhouse." (Hollywood Reporter)

                                                                                             

         Uh, Kim, we're over here.

Tonight's Picks: Thursday March 27

Miss/Guided
Becky has to organize a party for a teacher that everyone hates.

Reaper
An escaped soul wants to kill women prettier than she was in life. Her next target: Andi, the cute co-worker.

Make Me A Supermodel
Reunion special, with emphasis on the "bromance."

"The Office" Talks: Rainn Wilson and Greg Daniels

NBC's beloved and insane single-camera sitcom "The Office" returns with new episodes on Thursday, April 10. The other day, executive producer Greg Daniels sat down for a conference call with reporters, along with Rainn Wilson, who plays the especially nuts Dwight Schrute (right). An edited transcript follows...

Question: I’m wondering, you know, with the sitcom sort of becoming a lost art, what is the key to making a good one like you've done with The Office?
Greg Daniels: Rainn, what do you think?
Rainn Wilson: Go ahead, Greg. It’s all you.
Greg Daniels: Well, there’s the flip answer and the real answer, I guess. But, you know, I think it’s a lot about trying to be original and trying to be funny, and not being scared of also, you know, having some emotion in it or being real and taking the characters seriously. (Beat.) And developing a hit that was a hit in another country already.
Rainn Wilson:  I can’t top that, but I will say that I think the multi-camera sitcom format, as it kind of petered out over the last couple of years, (was) sticking to a kind of tried and true formula. And then the shows became more about the formula than about what the show was trying to say or trying to do. So it was more about a group of characters sitting in a common area. Kind of - we’ve set up some punchlines and kind of making fun of each other. And it just got tired and worn out. And it just is - it’s the genre right now that needs some reinvention.

"Top Chef:" Block Party, Stone-Soup Style

Tonight on "Top Chef:" Rick Bayless is the guest judge, which means we're talking high-end Mexican. The quickfire begins immediately: Make a taco. A fancy taco. 

Winner: Richard uses thinly sliced jicama instead of a tortilla for the shell. He gets immunity, and his dish gets onto the menu at Bayless' Topolobampo restaurant.

Runners-up: Duck taco by angry d-bag Andrew. During judgement he's quivering like a tweaker but Bayless loves it. Spike (right, in the silly hat) refuses to upscale the taco, and makes something delicious that loses only because he just hasn't followed the damn directions. I don't care how clever you are, you have to follow directions if you want to win. I learned that in first grade. When will these people learn it?

Next, the big challenge: Divide into two teams, hop into your product-placement-mobiles, and ... well, let's find out.

Workout Gets A Third Season? Why?

I watched two or three episodes of hotties-and-idiocy reality show "Work Out" when it came on air a couple years back, and grew bored with it, and discarded it. Yes, there are hotties, but I can see those anywhere on TV. I realized tonight that they've given it a third season, set to debut on April 15.

If you love people with no body fat and huge amounts of baggage, this is totally your chance to get on the bandwagon. If you think the show was terrible the first time around and unlikely to improve in a third season, you agree with me.

"ANTM:" Can We Just Agree You're All Crazy Bitches?

Oh! My! God! Tonight On "ANTM," Dominique is horrible! Dominique doesn't know how to set an alarm clock! Everybody hates Dominique! Not that any of the other models are going to win Miss Congeniality, but she's obviously the designated crazy one this season. No, nobody else is out to get you. They just think you're an inconsiderate bitch. There's a difference. Lauren, who has so far seemed balanced and human, thinks Dominique is irritating. If Lauren thinks she's horrible, I agree.

Frankly, I think Dominique (left, in last week's picture) is horrible anyway.

Challenge One: Learn to handle the pause-and-pose at the end of the runway, which is the prime photography spot. One secret is to pretend like you're in pain. "Oh my god, my weave tracks are killing me." Well, maybe you shouldn't have a stupid weave, girl.

Most of the models do OK, but Lauren's still way way off. Dammit, she's my favorite.

"American Idol" Liveblog

"American Idol!" Results show! Excellent! We're gonna do it with bullets tonight, because Aaron's excellent recap last night left us prose shy.

• Is it just me, or does Ryan's head come to a point tonight?
• Group number! They're young, they're mostly hot, but have you ever seen a crappier bunch of dancers? Kristy, although she does love the USA, is almost into Elaine Benis territory:

• No shit, the iTunes are full studio versions? Maybe I will go download the David Cook "Billie Jean." After that and "Eleanor Rigby," I think he could - and should - win, although he does have a cuteness deficit.
  
• But hey - Carly's trying to sound cute like she doesn't know what the mixing board is for. Isn't she the one who already had a major label record that tanked? Shouldn't she know her way around the inside of a studio? I choose to believe she's simply going with the phony gestalt of the whole show.
• First safe-or-not moment: Chikezie is in the bottom three! He could go. So could Carly or Ramiele.

Triabetes: The Diabetic Team Of Endurance Athletes

Not many people in the world can swim 2.4 miles in open sea, much less follow that swim with a 115-mile bike ride and a 26.2 mile run. People who can do it while also checking and adjusting their blood glucose levels manually are a very select breed: This year, there are ten of them. Yes, ten diabetic endurance athletes will be pushing the boundaries of personal ability and diabetes research at the Iron Man triathlon. They'll be inspiring people all over the world. And they're going to be in a movie, too. How awesome is this?

I Renounce "Doctor Who" And Other Works Of Satan

A man who's renounced his love of "Doctor Who" after a religious experience is selling his whole collection of models and memorabilia on EBay. Apparently although it's a sin for him to have a life-size model of Tardis, it's totally OK for someone else to have it, and for him to take money from someone who wants it. OK then. Good for him, I guess? Maybe he can start collecting "Davey And Goliath" or EWTN memorabilia now?

Will Tyra Keep Hosting "Top Model?"

Tyra Banks is reportedly tired of hosting "America's Next Top Model" and trying to think of someone else to run the show for her. Of course, not just anyone could provide Tyra's sassy charisma. Also, the concept for the show is getting kind of tired these days. And then there's the matter of Niki Taylor and Tyson Beckford hosting "Make Me A Supermodel," making things more challenging still for anyone who tries to fill Tyra's shoes.

Of course, Miss J. Alexander could do it, but is America ready for a mainstream reality show hosted by a drag queen? I mean, a queen aside from Tyra. Sure, J. is America's favorite transvestite, but the CW still might find it a little risky to put her in a starring role rather than leaving her as the fab sidekick.

One commenter on the LiveJournal gossip community Oh No They Didn't had a particularly good suggestion: Invite winners from previous seasons to compete for the hosting job. Of course, the danger with having a reality show where people compete to host a reality show is that the entire universe could collapse into a singularity. But it's a risk we'll just have to take.

Battlestar Marathon Ahoy!

As we approach the new season of "BSG" it's about time to have a marathon so anyone who missed an episode or three, and anyone just tuning in to the hype now, has a chance to catch up. Lo and behold, that's exactly what's happening. Check your TV schedules for upcoming re-airings of just about everything "Battlestar Galactica" related.

Morning Linkage

Ryan Seacrest's plan for world domination. The horror, the horror. (Tifaux)

Ellen the top TV host? Over Oprah? Seriously? (TV Decoder)

As predicted, the Pellicano trial is starting to sound like...a TV show. (Deadline Hollywood Daily)

"American Idol" still rules the ratings, but punting the big guy and the skater was good for "Dancing With The Stars." (AP)

Hey, with all the 1987 songs they sang last night on "Idol," how come nobody did Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up?" The LA Times says it's the hot new/old thing.  (LAT)

Jane Seymour as a crime-solving Martha Stewart clone? It's on Hallmark, too. Sounds grrrreat! (TV Squad)

And to thank you for reading this far, here's David Cook's awesome rearrangement of "Billie Jean" from last night's "Idol":

"Jericho": Don't Mess With Texas

Jericho
Title: Patriots and Tyrants
First Aired: 3/25/08

Thus ends the strange career of "Jericho," not with a bang, but a civil war. The show defied cancellation once, but lightning failed to strike a second time and the trial-run second season will be its last. It's gone off to that big TV set in the sky, to live on in our DVDs forever. Presumably on the DVD: the other season finale that was filmed, which left the story open for continuation. Which is different from this episode... which left the story open for continuation.

Tonight's Picks: Wednesday, March 26

American Idol
Special guest Kimberley Locke comes on to sing "Fall," and one of the 10 remaining finalists is voted off.

America's Next Top Model
The models get into an enormous fight because of an alarm clock. Also they learn about posing at the end of the runway. Mostly, though, it's infighting.

In Treatment
Sophie, week nine: Sophie's father intercepts her as she's heading to therapy, but is she ready to let him back into her life? Probably not - she's just learning to stop blaming herself for her parents' problems and mistakes.

Top Chef
The contestants must cook authentic Mexican dishes for a neighborhood party. As an added challenge, they can't use a supermarket. Rick Bayless (Frontera Grill, Topolobampo) is the guest judge.

I'm Ryan Seacrest And This Is A Heavily Gelled Pompadour

Tonight on "American Idol" the kids are singing songs from the year they were born. Yes, I'm going to feel old, I can just feel it. I'm not just a horrible curmudgeon, I'm also old. It's all downhill from here to the finale at the Nokia auditorium and then my lonely, un-Idol-ized grave.

My review in short: Michael Johns and David Cook were the best, with Syesha Mercado a close second. Chikizie Eze and Ramiele Malubay are my predictions for getting the axe tomorrow night.

Ramiele: She's been soulless for so many performances, I really expected worse from her. But she did Heart's song "Alone" - yes, from 1987 - and she puts a little personality into it. She didn't get the loud bits, and Randy didn't like it. Paula and Simon liked it, though. Frankly, I think she could well be the next Celine Dion: International appeal, big pipes, no personality.

Jason Castro: Also a 1987 baby, singing "Fragile" by Sting. I don't think I'm alone in thinking Sting has done nothing worth hearing since the Police. If song choice determines this round, Jason's screwed. My guess, though, is that he'll get by on those big blue eyes. Randy says he loves the song and it was a great choice. I just lost a lot of respect for Randy. Paula says he played it safe doing another panty-dropping "sincere" song. Simon hates it: It sounds like a subway busker, and Jason is coasting.

Syesha Mercado (top left): Also 1987. Singing "If I Were Your Woman," which seems like cheating, because it was originally recorded by Gladys Knight in 1970 and covered by Stephanie Mills in 1987 and Alicia Keys in 2005. It's a clever strategy, though, because voters from three different age brackets lost their virginities to this song. She's got a great voice, and more of her personality comes through it than, say, Ramiele. Randy is bowled over, saying it's the best she's done so far. Paula loves it. Simon thinks it's good but not that good.

NBC Wasn't Kidding...

...when they said they were going to punt business-as-usual, adapting to changing times and fallout from the writers strike with moves that might have seemed radical even a year ago. Step one, announced via the Hollywood Reporter today, is that they'll announce their 2008-09 schedule next week, far ahead of the usual May upfront sales hoopla. It will be interesting to see if any of the other networks follow suit, although what effect any of this will have on the viewer is not yet clear. They're also talking about a 52-week schedule.

Today In Other Critics: Sleeping Dogs Are Great

From Salon's "I Like To Watch" column comes the best insult I've seen so far this month:

Might I recommend another group of very idle beings, albeit ones with far more personality and flair than the "Big Brother" houseguests?

Welcome to the Sleeping Dog Channel, an online video site by the geniuses at World of Wonder productions. The site shows nothing but dogs sleeping, which makes it a little less interesting than, say, "Dancing With the Stars" and a little more interesting than "CSI: Miami."

Marco Pierre White Comes To US TV

Marco Pierre White is often described as one of the most eccentric, brilliant chefs in the world. He's perhaps best known for earning three Michelin stars, deciding that the award wasn't worth the suffering and work he'd put into it, and quitting his restaurant. He's also famous for being a hard-ass: He's ejected customers from his restaurant for not appreciating his food correctly, and once reduced a young chef named Gordon Ramsay to tears.

And while he's left the kitchen and turned to the business and consultancy side of the restaurant business, he's still doing some TV as well: He's replaced Ramsay as the host of the UK version of "Hell's Kitchen."

He's now moving to US TV for an NBC production called "The Chopping Block," which will feature teams of eight designing, opening, and running competing restaurants, while facing additional challenges thrown at them by the producers. The show should arrive some time in 2009.

Britney's Worth A Million To "How I Met Your Mother"

She still draws an audience, even if it's people tuning in in hopes of seeing a train wreck. Last night's Britney Spears-enhanced episode of "How I Met Your Mother" drew 10.62 million viewers, a season high for the show. That's up nearly a million from last week's previous high. (Nielsen Fast National Ratings via TV Decoder). Check out our review here. And here's some video:

"Transamerican Love Story" Puts New Twist On Old Formula

Just when you thought you'd seen all the dating shows you could possibly want comes "Transamerican Love Story," on gay-interest channel LOGO. It features male-to-female transsexual Calpernia Addams as the hose and prize, while the bevy of hot guys competing for her favors contains at least one man who started life as a woman.

The voiceover for promos of the show claims "the stakes are real" and says nothing about the breasts. Of course. It's rude to ask. (What else is rude to ask? She's got a whole list of things...)

She's also got a new dance video. It's silly but also kind of fun.

The Most Bizarre Animal Video I've Seen Today

I watch a lot of bad videos while looking for brilliant ones. This is one of the bizarre gems I just can't ignore. Yes, it's from Cute Overload. Other people seem to think it's adorable, but all I can think is "How hard is it to get moose-crap out of a shag carpet?"

Noir Meets Monsters

The voices and pacing aren't quite right, but the concept for HungryManTV's "Strange Detective Tales" is gold: Washed-up monsters who couldn't make it as movie stars, living in the shadows in Los Angeles. Igor and Renfield are private detectives, hired by a mermaid to find her missing werewolf husband, who wants to become a rock singer. Obviously.

I could see this getting picked up by the Cartoon Network; depending on whether it gets dirty and violent or not, it could play in the Adult Swim block or the youth block. I like it.

Morning reading

• "Lost" fan sez byebye Danielle. (Tifaux)
• "Dollhouse" a Whedonverse reunion? (TV Guide)
• Some byebye "Jericho" details. Don't get your hopes up for a cable resuscitation. (TV Guide)
• The deeply confusing "Scrubs" situation examined. (Buddy TV)
• RIP "The Return of Jezebel James." Sort of a mercy killing if you ask me. (Hollywood Reporter)

Britney Spears on "How I Met Your Mother": Troubled, Baby, One More Time

 Was it funny or just nasty that the producers of CBS' "How I Met Your Mother" cast Britney Spears as a minor-league psycho in her guest spot last night? There weren't any actual jokes about her being psychologically disturbed, but her character - a receptionist named Abby - had the overbright smile and oblivious persona of a cult member or celebrity stalker.  ("Young Frankenstein" fans, are you thinking what I'm thinking? That the character was... Abby Normal?) A minor kindness by protagonist Ted (Josh Radnor) led her to believe that they were soulmates, and the last shot of the episode was him sprinting down the sidewalk away from her pursuit.

Abby was reality-challenged, an odd choice of role for Spears, who recently spent time on a mental ward in real life after an involuntary commitment by her family. The singer's performance was sitcom-passable, as other critics in print and online said this morning, but hardly nuanced or believable, and to me the whole bit just seemed creepy.

Tonight's Picks: Tuesday, March 25

American Idol
The top ten singers compete.

Jericho
The series concludes for a second time, never to return. Jake and Hawkins are trying to prove there's some kind of conspiracy going on, but the Cheyenne officials are in on it, and that's going to complicate things.

Beauty And The Geek 
Someone is injured during a game of flag football. It's got to be one of the geeks. I mean, non-contact sport injury? That's almost as geeky as breaking a leg while playing chess.

Evening Gin And Peanuts. And, Uh, TV News.

• The scoop on DVR viewing: "Lost Most Time-Shifted Show By Percentage, American Idol By Viewers." (TV By The Numbers)
• But there are ratings issues for "Lost," too. (Buddy TV)
• Holy crap, somebody gave Jessica Simpson a gun! (Glilterati Gossip)
• "Prison Break" got a fourth-season pickup from Fox. (Buddy TV)
• Ryan Seacrest works hard. Or a lot, anyway. But I still thinking he's the luckiest mother----er on the planet. (Deadline Hollywood Daily)

                                                                                                                                         "The numbers? What do the numbers mean? Why, John, I thought you knew, they are a TIVO code."

BSG Creator Takes On "Children Of Men"

Far be it from us to call David Eick a master of really depressing television, except wait, that's exactly what we're going to call him. The master himself is reportedly working on a pilot script for "Children of Men," an adaptation of the P.D. James novel about a world in which all of the women become suddenly infertile. There was a 2006 big screen adaptation of the story, staring an extremely stubbly Clive Owen, but Eick says his TV show will take more inspiration from the book than the movie.

"It's really taking root more in the origins of the novels in that it will focus on the cultural movement in which young people become the society's utter focus, much like our culture, whenever Lindsay Lohan does something [and] it becomes the headline of every news show, it's about how, when you don't have a responsibility to the next generation and you're free to do whatever you want, where do you draw the line?"

Sounds cheery, no? Despite the depress-o-fest, there's a lot of great material in P.D. James' novel, and Eick has shown us what he can do with a bleak future (and Katee Sackhoff) in "Battlestar Galactica." Unfortunately, he's also shown us what he can do with a bland present (and Katee Sackhoff) in the aptly canceled "Bionic Woman." So color us hopeful but cautious at this stage in the game. We're waiting to hear more.

 

First The Beckhams, Now This. Brit Comedy "Geniuses" Hate America.

I thought the Revolution gave us the right to steal British sitcom ideas without remorse."The Office" is one of my favorite shows - you understand I mean the American version, right? I didn't even mind when Ricky Gervais, creator of the Brit version, got himself an HBO show and even wrote himself a part on "The Simpsons." But now he's in the middle of a trans-Atlantic pissing match with one of our local papers up here in Massachusetts. He's coming to Lowell to shoot a movie, but he mocked the paper's mildly starstruck item about his plans via videoblog before he even arrived to shoot his new movie. Way to warm up the locals, dude. The folks were all excited that their town is going to be a movie location, with stars like Jennifer Garner in the streets. They were even excited that you were coming. Now, maybe not so much. I thought the British were supposed to be gracious, reserved people. (Alas, the video's not imbeddable.)

Meanwhile, Simon Pegg, Brit star of "Hot Fuzz" and "Shaun of the Dead," is pissed off that his Brit-sitcom "Spaced" is being remade for American TV and that he and his director and co-star (different people) weren't even consulted. A flagrant snub, sez Pegg. Referring to Variety magazine's summary of the show 'Single-cam half-hour revolves around a young man and woman who pose as a couple in order to rent a cheap apartment', (Director David Wright) adds: 'It pains me to see it reduced to this.' All the time I've spent around TV people, there's still nothing funnier than sitcom creators whining about their artistic integrity.

Can You Surf A River? Yes, And Upstream, Too

I found this incredible surf video on Oddee. It shows someone surfing what is less a wave and more of a biannual river phenomenon: The Atlantic rushes up the Amazon river for miles, carrying away trees, animals, houses, and the occasional foolhardy or intrepid surfer. Dangerous? Of course! Awesome? Definitely.

Morning Easter Candy (Mmmm Bunny Ears)

• "High School Musical 3" news, including a new cast member from "Hannah Montana." (Buddy TV)
• Fred Thompson, scorned by Republican voters, is trying to get back into acting. (AP)
• Fun report from the "Gossip Girl" session at Paley Fest. (TV Addict)
• And another one. (Buzz Sugar)
• Britney's "How I Met Your Mother" wardrobe (right) is going on auction for charity. Awww. You know what's funny about the picture, though? She's pretending she can read. (AP)
• Pilot news: Amy Smart will star in the lame-sounding supernatural drama "Meant To Be's" and Fred Savage will star in "Single White Millionaire," both for CBS. (Hollywood Reporter)
• Producers still haven't figured out whether "Scrubs" will be on NBC or ABC or nowhere next year. (Hollywood Reporter)
• There's talk that the twice-canceled "Jericho" might go to cable but I wouldn't count on it. (TV Decoder)

"Bender's Big Score" Doesn't Score Big

The "Futurama" movie "Bender's Big Score" was released on DVD last November, but I was too cheap to buy it and waited for its TV debut last night. Even though it only cost me two hours, I think I still overpaid for it.

The show ended up being one of those tales of Fry and Leela's star-crossed love, interspersed with dated jokes about junk email and Star Wars and a couple of genuinely painful musical interludes. Fan-art videos on YouTube have already given us plenty of Fry/Leela sappiness, and the rest of the material was just plain limp. The only thing I laughed at in two hours was a throwaway line about a monkey having sex with a doll.

I'm saying this out of love.  I think "Futurama" is was of the best shows ever canceled before its time, but if this is a sign of what's to come from Planet Express, I'd rather it just stick with the reruns.

"Torchwood": There Goes The Bride

Torchwood
Title: "Something Borrowed"
First Aired (US): 3/22/08

There's an inherent problem with an episode that centers around a character acting like a completely irrational idiot. It's frustrating for fans, and if the character isn't typically a complete moron, it's jarring. You can see exactly how it came together, Gwen is getting married to Rhys and the thing that the writers wanted (indeed, the thing that many fans wanted) is to see Jack running in right when the pastor asks if anyone knows a reason why they can't be married. In order to get the characters to that point, however, Gwen has to be the biggest moron in the history of mankind. It's all romantic and melodramatic, but the amount of plot jury-rigging required really isn't worth it.

Tonight's Picks: Monday, March 24

Greek
A new semester for the improbable family-friendly show about fraternity